The lazy productive guy

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How can someone who is so lazy be so productive? This is the question my wife asks herself. At least that's what I imagine. I'm all or nothing. On or off. You might not want to hit the switch, if I turn on all hell brakes loose and if you turn me off you don't know when I might turn on again. I could go dormant for years.

My head is constantly looking for something it can throw me into. The band, the talk show, the screenplay add infinitum.

What's next? I'm not sure because I can't pay rent. I can live pretty close to the bottom, but when I start hitting it the fun ends.

My plan, pay rent, make a film, and get the comedy act together. I'm going to yoga to try and relax.

I'm loosing expectations

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I remember leaving you at the airport
a tear dropped down my cheek
I somehow knew this was the end of the line
the words I felt but couldn't speak
hatred fills my heart as years pass
when I think of times missed and the missing space
nothing fills that space now
but I try with every thing, person, and place
empty is where I keep my rage
I try to put things on top to keep it down
but nothing works for too long
the strength is strong enough to move the ground
I'm too stupid to not believe in god
why do these thoughts enter into my mind?
that's for the rich with no needs to fill
my need is strong yet I don't expect to find

The rich discouragement

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You stand by my side and look like I do
but something is different about the way through
you sleep on a satin pillow and I sleep on dirt
I go to your home and worry about my shirt
I'm lost in the sea grasping to breath
I can't ask for help you don't believe
so politely I drown not causing a fuss
to ask would be rude I take back on the bus
this friend thing's no good with my envious eye
oil and water are easier to make tie
I'm loosing my grip and you're just a mirage
the golden curtain fades with memories of the garage
I feel the gold locked deep in the vault
I forgot the key and make it your fault
I just want to fish so my family can eat
is a pole toO rude at the sole of your feet?

The comedy con

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Laughs are my only saving heart
I'm smiles and it's different from the start
the feeling of the touch I get inside
gives me back a line of jealous pride
it's sick with the gel and thunder talk
the under tone goes with us to walk
don't ask to make the sense of ease
take from me it's hard to please
when you hit the vibe the partys on
so ditch all the thoughts and the oldest con

From me

/
I'm not gettin much love
when I do it's the wrong kind
too much looking at the floor
no gettin in my mind
that's what turns me on
when you get really inside
and you take me for a walk
then you take me for a ride
that's the look I've got to keep
it'll stay with me a while
it's love that I can hold
it's the kind that's got the style
that's what I want
in a million there's one
I can't stop the thought
that it's me to get it from

People found

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Driving up blue I saw it come
it used to be red that's where I'm from
I stepped to the side she sped away
but then she came back the very next day
I want to be alone is what I said
she put me in the car said watch your head
I got inside the car against my will
I needed that ride but knew better still
cutting off my hair I lost my tone
on the side of the road I was left alone
nothing but a phone I called my girl
lucky for me she's in my world
up to the stars I headed quick
but I couldn't quite make my feet un-stick
back to the bottom I hit the ground
but I was happy with the land and people found

No talk

/
Trying to wake
loving to sleep
spirits await
mine can I keep?
It's there if you try
greatness is there
you can cry
because you care
but work is the way
that's what it will take
the desperate will stay
drive in your stake
claim your right
the birth of new
time is the fight
the fight is in you
take what I say
don't look back
go with the way
widen the crack
it's okay to look
the light helps the touch
the one with the book
doesn't talk much

A lonesome sound

/
When the tide goes in
and the rock is all alone
the moon is no man's friend
and the ocean was your home
the hours seem like years
and the night time has the helm
true are all my fears
and lonely is the realm
always count on time
this will come around
inside is the only crime
don't count on being found
seekers look for true
so seek the bells that ring
the only answer's you
inside the angels sing
listen to their words
and ride their lonesome sound
flying like the birds
and lifting off the ground
it's just a dream
a dream that feels real
it's not what may seem
but this they can not steal
here comes the sea
once again you live
now you can be free
with friends for you to give

Here while you're away

/
You stand
you hold your ground
I look for mine
it's nowhere found
you want to leave
I feel the same
all we do
is look for blame
I dig the hole
and try to hide
but I can't leave
we're both inside
it's hard to breath
I can't see
there's something lost
I think it's me
where did I go
I think I'm you
I given up
what's there to do
just wait to die
and keep the worst
no more heaven
just painful thirst
I try to drink
can't get the sip
I want the cool
I've lost my grip
I'm not home
the lights go down
I'm away
from my home town
I fade to black
to try and rest
it's the disease
that I know best
I'm all alone
but still you stay
I wait right here
while you're away

The grin

/
When you've got
the woman's voice in your head
and you've shot
a bullet right towards the dead
and the ring
won't stop tearing your ears
you want to sing
but those are yesterday's years
you've made it far
but that doesn't hold
you have the scar
and then after the old
it scares the mind
but it's time to let go
of the old find
the ideas that you know
everyone turns to ghosts
all the friends have their own
the ones with the most
try to mess with the tone
and this is right
it's yours to take in
pick up and fight
work with the grin

Priceless love

/
If you don't reach out
you can never find
how far your reach
goes into your mind
my mind is down
for repair
take all I have
but please take care
underground
is the stream
you can't see
stay on the beam
all the takers
they partake
in search of gold
that's true not fake
it's all in me
or so I'm told
wisdom comes
when you get old
hold on tight
don't let go
feel the air
in your hair flow
it's more than cost
it's more than pain
it's just the price
that keeps me sane
I live for love
I run for you
I think about
the things we do
I want your touch
your feel is warm
I look for strength
inside the storm
my head is clear
much like before
all the fights
inside the war
it's time for light
it's time for blue
it's time for calm
in what we do
sit with me
hold my hand
I'll be with you
until you stand
the diamond shines
the price unkown
priceless love
that I've been shown

I give to you
I give the blue

to you

Broken luck

/
I see signs but just the ones that I want
then one day they're all gone
I look through the home out back and out front
but everything's gone wrong
I grow numb with each thought
till I no longer feel
what once was sought
no longer seems real
the world had changed or more likely it's me
I've chased ghosts for so long
that they're all that I see
now I know something's wrong
pick up peices of broken luck
and try to make something good
but it's nowhere to truck
all the things you think should

Flipped

/
Holding time plotting crime
I've seen mine when the sun did not shine
eyes shut I felt cut
we can't miss not when it's like this
I know better I sent the letter
and now I know that I can not forget her

Sister jean don't be mean
you've better looking days than you think you've seen
it's not you it's just the crew
thinking they got better things to do

it's just a lie.

You've got the proud and the all too loud
going to save
you've got the quiet the internal riot
they behave

you hit my feet as I went down
you flipped the whole body around
now my eyes opened up
and I drink your water from the cup

going high
went down high
I can see
I can be
it's all me in the tree and the bumble bee
I can see

Learning

/
So hard at first with the pen in hand
learning's the worst when you're joining the band
songs get learned and the smiles start
the pain is burned and warms the heart
big is the smile as the pen does move
here comes the style and a point to prove
after he's tired it's taken a lot
the mind is fired and the new is caught
my love is strong and grows even more
as I ride along and help open a door
I cherrish our time more every day
there's something of mine going your way
it's this that I keep it's this that I save
sound may you sleep and awake may you crave

Park

/
Broken runs and the tv show
words gone bad and the want to go
kids stone face and the sound of death
no escape with the precious breath
it's time to kill and the moment is clear
the peoples will can get you somewhere near
but you need to tap into the one unknown
into the gap where you stand alone
the sky is bright and the call is dark
but the moon does light and the car does park
it's the type of place with feel so right
you loose the face but you gain your sight
so with the time as it always goes
I keep the rhyme from the one who knows

The helm

/
I've poked my head up above the clouds
to the place where angels spoke
I've played the songs to mindful crowds
I've felt rich when I was broke
morning comes with country air
and the more I felt I'd write
cause the angels did begin to stare
as I listened I did write
I want to see another realm
the one I touched before
give me license to the helm
and reach into my core

it's coming.