I just have a hammer

It falls apart
I try to hold it together
It's crumbling
It's changing
It's disheartening
It's disappearing
It's shattered

I have everything I need
Everything I want
It's staring me in the face

It's not enough
It should be
It could be

I'm not looking at the miracle
But it's looking at me
It is me
It's in me
It abounds me

I say to the sky
The sky is quiet
The answer is silence

The silence makes my ears ring
My blood is loud
It rushes through my body

I fear it to stop
These thoughts
I used to change them
The change has gone
The mortar has set in

Break it
Take the hammer
This is my only tool I have left