My mission statement

What's my mission statement? Half the time I'm checked out, just going through the motions, definitely not thinking about my purpose or mission in life or whatever activity I'm engaged in. But I want one. I want to move forward in life. I don't want to always be a middle aged open miker who can't support his family. I want to do some shit and I want to feel good about doing it. I used to spend a lot of time wondering if I'd ever meet my wife and start a family. Ok, put a check in that box. The wife thing, check. The kid thing, done it.

Now all I have to do is be a good husband and a good father. Sounds easier than it is. It occured to me one day that I can't be either a good Dad or Husband if I'm not true to myself. How can you set a good example if you're lovig a lie? I knew I had to be living the truth if I was ever going to be the husband or dad I wanted to be. The problem was my foundation to life was faulty. I had to tear the whole thing down.

It's tough to be a good Dad and Husband when your family is living in a demolition zone. This is where we've been residing. Whenever you start a constuction process they say to expect it to be double the money and twice as long as the contractor quotes you. I'm far in this thing but at least I feel like a strong cement ground level foundation has been poured.

Wives and families don't give a fuck about foundations. They don't understad what it means to be a man. All they want is a warm place to sleep, a big bed and granite counter tops. Like I said we're sleeping on cement. The family is not happy with Dad. But still I'm doing what I think I have to do to be a man. Sometimes the man has to be a man whether his family understands or not.

I too am feeling like I overextended myself. What if this strong foundation I'm building never gets a house built on top of it? I don't want that to happen but these fearful thoughts are coming into my head. These thoughts will hopefully serve to motivate me. Now is not the time to rest on my laurels. Back to the mission statement. I'm in the middle of a bunch of rubble. I'm covered in dust. Sometimes I get overwhelmed an I don't know what to do. This is where I need a mission statement. A statement that tells me if I'm headed in the right direction.

Statement: To support my wife and family through my creativity.

My creativity I my personal truth. I need to follow this path if I'm ever going to be a real man. Only by becoming a real man can I be a true example to my kids and husband to my wife. Whenever I am stuck I can ask myself, "Is what I'm doing now going to help me support my family through my creativity?" If the answer is yes I proceed and if it is no I change my direction. Right now I am writing, opening the creative door. My answer now is yes.

So far I haven't figured out how to support my family through masturbation. Until then I change directions.