Some type of a circle

I'm beyond lost now
I could say it's dark but it's more than that
I have quiet periods
I see colors
I'm high
But sometimes I'm in too much pain
It's all there
As ugly as I can be
I am beautiful
I hate this
But this is life
I can't seem to embrace this truth
But unfortunately truth eventually embraces us all
I didn't think I could still stand
But my legs work
Today I got up and walked
I'm not here but I am somewhere
It's not the end
I'm back again
It's some type of a circle